Paranoia, Paranoia, Somebody’s Coming to Get Me

Did you know I live in a state of paranoia? I am learnig this about myself.

Before I get into a car, I do a quick check into the backseat to make sure someone’s not hiding out ready to pounce me while driving.

I do not open the door to strangers, even during broad daylight. I will talk to the solicitor through the door.

I check and recheck all doors are locked at night.

I keep a Mag-lite next to my bed at night and sometimes under my pillow on nights Andy is away.

I sleep with a night light in the bathroom.

I speedwalk from stores to the parking lot with keys in hand.

Sometimes I think I’m just being safe, but other times when I begin to list these things out, I realize I’m flat our paranoid of the universe.

I wish I could rest easier.

"When I am afraid, I will put my trust in You."

Psalm 56:3

20 Comments

  1. nadine said . . .

    i know exactly how you feel. i act pretty much the same way. always thinking someone is out to get me.

    Posted February 17, 2008 at 9:56 am | Permalink
  2. *mindi* said . . .

    i’m a lot like this, a little less extreme, but always fearful of something bad happening. we had some crazy stuff happen when i was a kid (peeping toms and such) so now i always feel like if there is a crack in the blinds or curtains, somebody must be looking through it.

    unsettling, no?

    Posted February 17, 2008 at 11:30 am | Permalink
  3. Dana said . . .

    I’m sort of that way too, but I call it being cautious. You read about bad things that happen to people, and probably a lot of them weren’t being cautious or “paranoid.” When I close my garage door, I look to make sure no one has slipped under it while it was closing, because that has happened many times (that I’ve read) and bad people HAVE hid in cars, so you’re not being paranoid - just cutious! I always hurry in a parking lot too, when I go to the store at night, because things have happened in parking lots too! Our kids need our mommies, so we have to be safe!

    Posted February 17, 2008 at 2:39 pm | Permalink
  4. Peris said . . .

    Not paranoid. I am so the same way. I also click my keys so the lights come on in my car first…I look then i get in. I triple check all the doors at night and even in my car if someone is walking by. We started the saftey video put out by Julie Clark with rory….so much to teach the kids without seeing paranoid. I get scared of those “bad” people….so I am always overly cautious. Trying to notice everything. I have made some stupid choices though over the years and I am glad nothing bad ever happened. I think becoming a mom changed a lot of ways I do things…

    Posted February 17, 2008 at 5:39 pm | Permalink
  5. LB said . . .

    Paranoid? If that’s what you call it, then I’m there with you! I do everything that you do apart from the Mag Lite–I sleep with the phone by my bed to call 911 in case I hear someone trying to break into the house!

    Posted February 17, 2008 at 8:37 pm | Permalink
  6. Jenny L. said . . .

    I call it being cautious too. You can never be too careful. I will not open my door either to strangers. I used to cringe when a solicitor came to the door because I thought they would think I was a weirdo because I won’t open the door. Can you imagine? I don’t know what I was thinking!

    Posted February 17, 2008 at 9:47 pm | Permalink
  7. cindybingham said . . .

    You are smart my dear friend. Give yourself some credit.

    Posted February 17, 2008 at 9:58 pm | Permalink
  8. marie said . . .

    my old school trick is to hold my keys in my fist so two of them are sticking out between my fingers so if i ever have to give a punch, it will be a really, really effective one.

    Posted February 18, 2008 at 3:54 am | Permalink
  9. Lisa sp said . . .

    Ooh, I do those things too. Also, when my husband is gone, I put something in front of the door, so if someone does come in, they will knock it over. And if I am in a public bathroom alone, I check all the stalls to make sure it is safe. I think it is paranoid, but in a good way!

    Posted February 18, 2008 at 6:04 am | Permalink
  10. Jaime said . . .

    So I do the same, if I allow myself to think about it .. if I just do my stuff and not think about the crazy, I’m ok. Remember that song, “I always feel like somebody’s watchin’ me”.. that song used to freak me out :-)

    Posted February 18, 2008 at 9:06 am | Permalink
  11. steph r said . . .

    I’m like that too. I used to repeat “For God has not given me a spirit of fear…” a lot when I was a kid and I still catch myself doing it sometimes.

    Posted February 18, 2008 at 9:29 am | Permalink
  12. erin said . . .

    Minus the nightlight thing I could have blogged this myself!

    Posted February 18, 2008 at 11:14 am | Permalink
  13. Anel said . . .

    As you can see you are not alone. I do all of what you are doing and its a good thing because I have found where one of us have forgotten to close the garage door or locked the back door after letting the dog out. There have been times when I have openned the door to a solicitor and then cringe inside. I always say a thank you to God as I close the door that nothing bad happened. So these things we do keep us and our families safe. I do the Mag-lit thing too 1. its heavy and a good weapon 2. if the lights go out I have my light at hand. Also, a past coworker told me she sleeps with the cell phone by her bed because hardlines can be cut.

    Posted February 18, 2008 at 12:51 pm | Permalink
  14. nana said . . .

    Lauren looks like she is sleeping on Andy’s laptop. I finally got over my paranoia about checking the door a hundred times before I go to sleep at night, but I do have one car wash. I worry that one of the guys will drive off with my car after it goes through the wash. I thought that happen once and now I worry everytime I go to the car wash.

    Posted February 18, 2008 at 1:40 pm | Permalink
  15. Vonnie Mulkey said . . .

    Thanks…I especially needed that today! I have been thinking about that verse all morning - Justin is gone for a few days this week, and I am nervous which is unlike me :) Maybe it’s being in a foreign country?

    Posted February 19, 2008 at 4:25 am | Permalink
  16. Andy said . . .

    Funny how all you ladies share you paranoid thoughts, thus giving each other more to be paranoid about! Imagine someone doing all these things and how crazy that would seem. But if they are crazy when you do them all, I would submit that they are crazy when you do any of them.

    Cheers (and sleep well)…

    Posted February 19, 2008 at 8:20 am | Permalink
  17. Melissa~ said . . .

    I am way too ADD to *remember* to be paranoid…*LOL*…

    Although when hubby is out of town I do have my moments. I tend to repeat scriptures like steph r.

    If you are nervous in a dark parking lot singing praise & worship songs really loudly helps too…and I think it scares bad guys…{and probably some normal people, but who cares, right?}

    M~

    Posted February 26, 2008 at 7:10 am | Permalink
  18. michael hacker said . . .

    i’m more severe than this anyone tell me whats wrong how to fix it if so e mail me mikehacker@ardmore.net

    Posted March 2, 2008 at 11:00 pm | Permalink
  19. the one who is out there said . . .

    it is sad to hear this, people thinking they are parinoid when they have no clue what it is really like to live in fear. do yourself a favor and leave you doors unlocked for just one night.

    Posted October 2, 2008 at 12:34 am | Permalink
  20. ErikW said . . .

    Fear and paranoia are tools of the Devil. I pray that God strengthens you and gives you courage! Tell your closest friends your worries and pray together!

    Posted January 13, 2009 at 8:38 pm | Permalink

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